SARAH Harding has recalled her heartbreak and regret over losing her gran to cancer when she was a teenager.
The 39-year-old, who is currently fighting her own cancer battle, was left blindsided when she learnt her dad’s mum was ill and was unable to see her much in her final days because she had moved up North with her mum.
The Mirror have reported that she opened up about the loss in an excerpt from her new book Hear Me Out.
It reads: "The worst part about moving is that not long after we left, my gran, Dad’s mum, was diagnosed with cancer which took her quite quickly. The speed of it came as a complete shock. I knew she was very ill, but I wasn’t prepared to lose her that quickly.
"Luckily, my dad was able to be with her a lot of the time, but I didn’t really get to see her. After she died, I was heartbroken and full of regret but also angry at everyone, including myself.
"I was angry that we moved up north, angry that gran had died and angry that I was messing up in yet another school."
Elsewhere in the book, Sarah revealed her joy after she was told that the tumours in her brain and lungs had reduced as her cancer treatment "moves in the right direction".
The Girls Aloud star was diagnosed with breast cancer in early 2020, and was later told the devastating news that it had spread around her body.
She has since undergone chemotherapy and has shared the good news about her treatment having an impact.
It reads: "Before I put this book to bed, I wanted to share a little bit of positive news.
"MRI scans at the end of December revealed that the tumours in my brain and in my lung have shrunk a bit with the treatment."
Sarah goes on to admit that she doesn't know "exactly what this means", but she was happy with the direction it was going.
She adds: "Right now, every little victory feels momentous.
"With this news under my belt, I was able to enjoy a relaxing quiet Christmas with mum and yes, I got plenty of lovely Christmas pressies."
The book also sees Sarah detail her fear at reuniting with her Girls Aloud bandmates after suffering side effects from cancer treatment – including bloating and her eyelashes falling out.
She also revealed that she turned down radiotherapy when her breast cancer spread to form a second tumour.
She wrote: "The disease has worsened, as has my prognosis. This tumour is the thing that scares me more than anything because I think it will be the thing that affects me the most.
"I don’t know what it’s going to do, but it’s there. There’s an option for radiotherapy on my skull but I don’t want to go through that and lose my hair at this stage, especially with no guarantees at the end of it.
What is breast cancer and how does it spread?
BREAST cancer is the most common type of cancer in the UK – with one woman diagnosed every ten minutes.
While most women can get breast cancer, it is most common in women who are over the age of 50.
According to Cancer Research UK, breast cancer starts in the breast tissue.
Breast cancer develops when abnormal cells in the breast begin to grow and divide in an uncontrolled way and eventually form a growth.
Most invasive breast cancers are found in the upper-outer quadrant of the breast.
If it’s not diagnosed and treated it can move through the lymph or blood vessels to other areas of the body.
Each year in the UK there are around 55,200 new breast cancer cases.
This equates to around 150 new cases a day.
It also accounts for 15 per cent of all new cancer cases each year.
If the cancer is diagnosed at its earliest stage then 98 per cent of people will survive the disease for five years or more.
If it is diagnosed at the latest stage, then just 26 per cent of people survive for five years or more.
What are the four stages of breast cancer?
Stage one: The cancer is small and only in the breast tissue – but can also be found in lymph nodes close to the breast.
Stage two: The cancer is either in the breast or in the nearby lymph nodes or both.
Stage three: The cancer has spread from the breast to the lymph nodes or the skin of the breast or the chest wall.
Stage four: The cancer has spread to other parts of the body.
What are the signs?
- A lump in the breast or armpit
- Changes in the positioning of the nipple
- Nipples leaking in women who have not had children
- Skin changes
"It might seem vain thinking about my hair, but my thinking was that if there’s a chance I’ve only got six months, then I’ve got six months.
“Losing my hair probably wasn’t going to change that, so if there’s another way to manage the disease or treat it, then let’s do that. I don’t want to feel like I have to spend whatever time I have left hiding away.”
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