DEAR DEIDRE: I’M worried about my dad. He drinks on and off all day.

He’s a pensioner, so I never imagined I’d be concerned about him at this stage of his life.

I think he might be depressed. Dad is 79 and Mum is 78.

He refuses offers of help, won’t go to the doctor and can’t admit that he has a problem.

If he would take something for his depression, then surely he wouldn’t need to drink?

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I’m a 52-year-old man. Mum seems so down with it all and I think she’s at breaking point.

On the days Dad doesn’t drink, she’s happy. He might go cold turkey for a week but, like clockwork, his drinking starts up again.

He has never been violent. He just gets confused with the drink and sleeps.

It’s a terrible way to live.

DEIDRE SAYS: You are right to worry. Your dad is dependent on alcohol and in denial.

Only he can decide to change but visit him when he is sober and tell him you are worried about him – and about your mother.

My support pack Drinker In The Family explains tactics, while Al-Anon Family Groups help families of those with an alcohol problem (al-anonuk.org.uk, 0800 0086 811).

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