Has anyone perfected the art of the first date? Just wondering, because it sure as heck ends up more awkward than not. Raise your (virtual) hand if you’ve been on a dinner date searching for anything—anything—to talk about because you’ve already breezed through your planned points of conversation. Big same.

“A lot of people suggest just going out for dinner and a drink, although I don’t think that’s really that effective,” says Marisa T. Cohen, PhD, LMFT, relationship scientist and therapist. “If you’re in a noisy, crowded place, you’re not going to be able to have these deep conversations that allow you to suss out whether or not you like this person.”

Instead, Cohen recommends planning a date where you can show off your amazing personality. That might be lending your know-how during a pottery workshop, or showing off your navigation skills during a bike ride.

After all, the point is to stick out in the pool of potential suitors, right? Just like you might be queuing up all the Hinge hotties, the person on the other side is doing the same. “You want to do something that’s not the same cookie cutter experience that everyone else is having over a meal,” Cohen says.

Meet the Experts:
Marisa T. Cohen, PhD, LMFT is a relationship scientist and marriage and family therapist in New York.

Megan Fleming, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and resident sexpert with Promescent, a sexual pleasure retailer.

Terri Orbuch, PhD, is a relationship expert, therapist, and author of Finding Love Again: 6 Simple Steps to a New and Happy Relationship.

Maryanne Comaroto, PhD is a relationship coach based in Marin County, CA.

Meredith Golden is the founder of dating coaching company Spoon Meet Spoon.

Since the anxiety that comes with planning a memorable date is very real, here’s a prepared a list of not-so-boring first date ideas to get your next fling off to an exciting start—even if it ends there. And as the saying goes, “It’s either a great experience or a great story.” Let’s go date:

1. Check out a sports game.

Both Pats fans? Both hockey fanatics? Why not try to catch your fave teams on the field or ice? “Dates that incorporate a shared interest or passion are an amazing way to see one another in your element, while also creating a memory together,” says psychologist and sex therapist Megan Fleming, PhD, resident sexpert with Promescent, a sexual pleasure retailer.

2. Tour a brewery.

More a brewski babe than a wine taster? Invite your date to explore your fave (or a new!) brewery with you. “Breweries usually allow you to order a flight of different beers, which can be a fun bonding experience,” says Fleming. Another perk of breweries is that the people-watching is usually great.

3. Go on a run together.

Er, jog. If you both put “marathoner” in your dating app profile, why not use your shared love of lacing up by hitting your local running path together? Just be sure to make a pact ahead of time that you’re not gonna sprint. After all, if you’re breathing too heavy, you won’t be able to learn more about one another.

“When did you get into running?” and “What races are on your running bucket list?” are great starter convos.

4. Go thrifting.

Sustainability is sexy. Get thrifty and head to the antique shops with your date—it’s also a fun way to get a feel for your date’s fashion sense.

5. Make fancy cocktails (or mocktails) together.

Get in the kitchen and whip up some yummy cocktails—or mocktails, if that’s your thing!—together. You’ll get a sense of your date’s sense of creativity (and taste in drinks, of course). Whether someone likes vodka or tequila more can say a lot about a person.

6. Hit up a coffee shop.

Okay, okay, it’s not the most creative idea on the list… But a coffee shop really does make a good first date. “There’s a natural ending to a coffee date, when you finish your first cup you can decide to leave or extend the date,” says Fleming.

Remember: The point of the first date is to get a sense of whether or not this is someone you’d have interest in getting to know further. It doesn’t have to be a marathon-date to be a good date.

7. Take a pottery class.

Recreate that steamy moment in Ghost and check out a pottery class with your date—as long as they’re okay with getting their hands a little dirty. If neither of you have been to a pottery class before, don’t worry! Trying new things with your date can be a great way to bond, says relationship expert and therapist Terri Orbuch, PhD, author of Finding Love Again: 6 Simple Steps to a New and Happy Relationship.

8. Go to a drag show.

Hey queer folks, this one is for you! Grab the hottie you met on Lex or the ex-girlfriend of your ex-girlfriend, and head to your local drag show. What’s a better way to spend the night than jamming to Lady Gaga and Mariah Carey surrounded by other peeps in the LGBTQ+ community? Nothing.

9. Hit up your local gay bar.

Support your local queer spot while getting to know a local queer (heh).

Pro tip: Go on a weeknight. These bars are usually less packed Monday through Thursday. Plus, the music won’t be quite as loud, so you’ll actually be able to hear one another when swapping life stories.

10. Go horseback riding.

Yeehaw! If you and your date are feeling a bit more adventurous, try horseback riding together. Maryanne Comaroto, PhD, a relationship coach based in Marin County, CA, always recommends outdoor first dates. “I generally recommend getting outside or doing something together where you can see each other move through the world,” she explains. (Oh, and this one is also majorly Instagrammable.)

11. Do goat yoga.

Don’t like the thought of looking at animals behind bars? You might like the thought of letting them bleat at you mid-sun salutation. Behold: Goat yoga. A fun activity that involves doing a group yoga class while surrounded by baby goats, goat yoga is a great first date for animal-lovers, adventurers, and yogis.

12. Visit the dog park.

“A lot of people go to a dog park as a first date because it allows you to meet one another’s animals,” says Fleming. Assuming both of your pups are off-leash trained and good with other dogs, this is an easy pick.

13. Play trivia or bingo.

Going out to play trivia or bingo is a great first date option, says Orbuch. “Games are fun and lively and add some excitement to the first date,” Orbuch explains. “You might even be working together as a team for some of the games. Working together for a joint outcome [also] creates a bonding experience.”

14. Go out for dessert.

IMO, going out for dinner on a first date is a total cliché—but going out for dessert? That’s a different story. If you’ve got a bit of a sweet tooth, grab fro-yo or another sweet treat with your date (Brownies? Cookies? Just spitballing here.) Better yet, stop by your local grocery store and grab a pint (or gallon) of ice cream to share.

15. Go on a hike.

“It’s wise to use what you know about somebody to plan a date that you’ll both enjoy,” says Fleming.

So, if you both listed National Parks as a life highlight in your dating bio, or you’ve bonded over your shared love of Merrells, plan a dirt date. If all goes well, who knows, maybe you’ll be able to share a kiss at the top of the climb. Views on views on views!

16. Go to an escape room.

“I always say that dates that both excite and terrify can be great dates,” says Fleming. “Escape rooms are something that allow you to experience both emotions, and most cities have them.” Your move: Throw on your best detective coat and play Nancy Drew.

17. Play 36 questions.

Have you heard of 36 questions? It’s a series of personal questions that have been shown by science (really!) to speed up the rate at which people fall in love. “The idea is that these questions can promote mutual vulnerability,” explains Fleming.

According to her, answering a handful of these questions could be a good first date activity. The caveat: Because it’s such an intimate activity, it’s best for people who already know each other in some context. Or, for those who have had a number of ~*deep*~ Facetime calls.

18. Play two truths and a lie.

Hot take: Organized conversation is the sh*t. If you and your right swipe aren’t able to meet up IRL, Fleming suggests planning a FaceTime date. “You can gamify the virtual date by playing a game like two truths and a lie or truth or dare,” she says. To invite someone to one of these virtual hangs, you might say: “Could I interest you in a FaceTime date this Friday? Let’s both come prepared with two truths and a lie.”

19. Check out an art opening.

If you and your date are artsy types, consider checking out an art opening or gallery together. This can be a creative way to see how your date articulates the world around them, as well as how they behave in new social situations, says Comaroto.

20. Go to a farmers’ market.

Strolling around a farmers’ market is a great joint activity, says Orbuch. “Outdoors, fresh air—all great for a first date, if possible,” she adds. Grab a coffee and your tote bag, and you’re all set.

21. Watch the sunset together.

I promise this one isn’t boring. Watching the sunset is a classic for a reason, and better yet? It’s free. “The first date doesn’t have to be expensive,” Orbuch says. “It’s more important what you do and say on the first date, than how much money is spent on that first date.”

22. Take a sex education class.

Did you meet on FetLife, Feeld, or another platform known for connecting sex-positive singles? “Are you both specifically looking for a more explicit sexual encounter?” says Fleming. “Then you might decide to take a sex education class together.” Do your research to find in-person and online offerings.

23. Play pool.

Take things old school by playing pool together at a billiard hall. (It really takes playing 8 Ball on your phone up a notch.) Don’t be afraid to get a little competitive, and most importantly, have fun! Lots of pool halls also have food and drinks, so you can grab a quick bite to eat afterwards.

24. Catch a performance in the park.

“I’m a big proponent of experience-based dates,” Cohen says. Imagine a warm summer night listening to a jazz quartet over a shared bottle of wine. Live music is always a good move, but this strips away the pressure of committing to a full-on concert. This way, the more casual atmosphere allows you to see your date, chat, and leave when you want.

25. Go axe throwing.

Howdy, partner. Don your favorite plaid shirt and show off your badass side on this active date. A boost of adrenaline also bodes well for your budding connection. “Research shows if you’re able to get your physiological arousal level up, you wind up attributing it to the person you’re with,” Cohen says. “You feel like you’re more into them.” No wonder the Bachelorette dates are bungee-jumping bonkers.

26. Go to a yoga class.

Want to get your blood pumping and body moving? Comaroto recommends hitting up a yoga class with your date. “[It’s a great way] to find out how competitive, curious, playful, or open-minded they are,” Comaroto says. Yoga can also help nip those first date-jitters in the bud—after all, Comaroto’s go-to advice for a first date? “Relax if you can, and trust yourself.”

You’ll need a cute yoga mat. Here are some options:

27. Go to a hot yoga class.

Up the ante, crank up the heat, and go to a hot yoga class with your date. Sweat out those nasty toxins and get your heart rate up—and if all goes well, hit the showers together afterwards (hint, hint).

28. Head to a gin or whiskey tasting.

Wine and beer not your thing? Orbuch says heading to a gin or whiskey tasting is a bit more unique than going to a winery or brewery—and it can give you and your date a lot to talk about. “[It’s] fun, and you can talk about all the different whiskeys and gins,” Orbuch says.

29. Plan a progressive dinner.

Here’s a twist on the typical dinner date: Instead of grabbing a table at your go-to date spot, agree on a neighborhood and visit different places for drinks, appetizers, dinner, and dessert. You’ll try out new restaurants and bars, but without the stiff interview feeling typical dinner dates bring. If all goes well, you can add a nightcap to the itinerary…

30. Get sporty (at a bar).

There are two types of people in this world: those who get heated over company softball league games, and those without an athletic bone in their body. Opt for a bar with ping pong tables, shuffleboard, and the like. Make a cheeky bet, and see what kind of competitive streak you’re working with.

31. Take a trapeze class.

Why not? Maybe don’t waste this one on any old Hinge match, but it’s a great option for someone you’ve casually hung out with already, says Meredith Golden, founder of dating coaching company Spoon Meet Spoon: “Take the pressure to talk off the table and just have some light fun enjoying an activity together.”

32. Visit a botanical garden.

Pop into a sauna of an indoor botanical garden, or wander outside at a Japanese garden to get in touch with your inner flora lover. Your Instagram Story will thank you.

33. Stargaze.

Okay, it might sound cheesy. And yes, while it might be a little cliché, it is romantic. Find a pretty lookout point in your city and enjoy the view. “Choose a place where you and your date can talk, observe, and interact,” Orbuch says. Once again, you don’t always need a bunch of frills (or a ton of money) to make your first date memorable.

34. Take a flower arranging class.

You don’t have to get your date flowers if you take a flower arranging class together! Learn something new together and arrange some pretty blooms and foliage. And as a bonus, if there’s no spark, classes provide you with a set end time—Comaroto always suggests knowing the easiest way out of a bad first date.

35. Head to a winery.

Now this one’s Instagrammable as heck. Not only can you day drink in a gorgeous locale, but you can also snag a spot on a tour of the vineyards and fermenting facilities. Bring a bottle home to remember the day… even if you end up not wanting to remember the date. Either way, you’ll have a delish souvenir.

36. Play laser tag.

You probably weren’t expecting this one, but heal your inner child and go play a game of laser tag at an arcade. “Think outside the box and make the first date unique and impactful,” Orbuch advises. “Make this date different and out of the ordinary!” Hey, I bet neither you nor your date has gone on this first date before.

37. Take a bike ride.

Rent bikes on a sunny afternoon and take turns deciding where to stop off, like a pretty park or a local coffee shop for a latte pick-me-up.As you pedal along, Cohen suggests checking in with yourself. Can you see yourself riding down the same path ~of life~ with this person?

38. Get afternoon tea.

A cuppa tea, madam? Reenact Bridgerton or Downton Abbey and sip afternoon tea at a tea parlour, if your date isn’t a coffee aficionado. Get gussied up, order some tea sandwiches, and nurse a cup of tea over some scintillating conversation. It’s a classy and sophisticated outing that’ll be sure to leave a great first impression on your date.

39. Have a picnic.

Now, a picnic might sound more romantic than it actually turns out. Have your way with the Whole Foods hot bar and grab a canned wine or two. Just don’t forget the blanket—no first date “my butt is wet” horror stories allowed.

40. Go to a poetry reading.

Want to take things with your date to a deeper level? Going to a poetry reading is a great way to gain insight into your date’s level of sensitivity and even their ability to listen, says Comaroto. Now that’s hot.

41. Visit an arcade.

Embrace your inner child and play some Skee-ball, laughing along the way. And, while you’re waiting for the air hockey table to open up, it’s a perfect time to get to know one another. “During that first date conversation, it’s a lot about getting to understand one another’s [personalities],” Cohen says.

42. Get your tarot cards read.

Woo-woo or not, getting your cards read lets you into your date’s mind. You can’t help but breach those vulnerable topics like love, your place in life, and everything in between that helps you understand one another on a deeper level, Cohen says.

43. Get your palms read.

If you’re not really into tarot but want to see if your budding romance is really meant to be, get your palms read together. Fun fact: Palm reading can actually tell you a lot about your relationships, hand analyst Helene Saucedo previously told Women’s Health.

44. Sing your favorite songs at karaoke.

Comfort zone? Don’t know her. Instead of asking, “What’s your go-to karaoke song?” on a first date, why not show it? Cohen says performing in front of other people can get your heart beating fast, an experience that will bring you closer to your date.

45. Go to a board game bar.

Board game bars are typically cozy and low-key, so you can nurse a drink in between games of Connect Four. Share stories from your childhood, or recent game nights with friends. You’ll fall into those intimate conversations Cohen says are so important.

46. Go apple or berry picking.

Depending on the time of year, Orbuch suggests driving out to the countryside to pick some fresh apples or berries with your date. “You can still chat and talk together as you’re doing something unique and fun,” Orbuch says. Afterwards, get to know each other better over some apple cider, or hitch a hay ride to keep the date going.

47. Have a beach day.

Like long walks on the beach? Same. Use your beach day to “let the other person into your world, and hopefully you share some of these interests together,” Cohen says. Regardless of how it ends, you’ll get a healthy dose of vitamin D.

48. Visit a cat café.

Cute kittens and coffee? Sign me up. Bonding over cuddly animals and vanilla lattes sounds like the perfect first date to me. And, since most cat cafes require a reservation with a time limit, it allows for the perfect natural end for your date—no awkward, lingering goodbyes. “Keep it short,” Orbuch advises. “Two to two and a half hours is ideal for a first date.”

49. Go to a cabaret.

It’s impossible not to have a good time at a cabaret. Drinks are flowing, good vibes are in the air, you’re cheering on the performer, and you can let loose with your date. It’s all about feeding off of each other’s energy. What more could you want?

50. Go to a jazz club.

You like jazz? Instead of going to a normal ol’ club, try hitting up a jazz club. Enjoy some tasty cocktails, delicious hors d’oeuvres, and groovy live music. And hey, if you’re lucky, maybe your date will be into dancing, too, and you can recreate that one scene in La La Land. Where’s Ryan Gosling when you need him…?

51. Go on a boat.

Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream of love. Too much? Okay, so you might not feel comfortable enough to hop in a kayak with a first date (understandable). In that case, a sightseeing boat tour is the move—as long as no one gets seasick.

52. Take an archery class.

Harness your inner Katniss Everdeen (or Cupid!) and take an archery class. Sure, it might be a bit out of the box, but that’s what makes a first date fun and exciting! Orbuch says anything that gets your adrenaline going makes for a spot-on first date. Just watch your aim.

53. Go to the zoo.

First date talk can be exhausting even for the biggest chatter of them all, says Golden. Date fatigue is real. So if things get stale? Focus instead on that lioness that’s giving you the eyes.

54. Jam out at a concert together.

If you want to take browsing a record shop or seeing a performance in the park up a notch, why not go to a concert together? Like Cohen says, experience-based first dates are a winner for a reason. If you both love dancing to Lizzo or singing along to Post Malone, get some tickets and enjoy some live music. It’ll totally be a first date to remember, and it’ll surely give you both something to talk about afterwards on the drive home.

55. Visit a bookstore.

You can tell a lot about a person based on the books they read—and if they comfortably navigate a bookstore. Trade recommendations and get a peek into your date’s interests bookcase by bookcase. And if you’re lucky? You’ll catch a poetry reading.

56. Go skating (roller or ice, your call).

Rent out some skates and go roller or ice skating. You can laugh at how bad you’re both at it, or, if you’re both skating experts, you can teach each other some new tricks (wink, wink). “For a first date, I think activities that have you side by side and moving around are great ways to start to get to know each other,” Comaroto says.

57. Go rock climbing.

Belay, baby! Test your sense of trust right out of the gate, and take your attraction to new heights. “You’ll come away from it like, ‘My heart’s beating so fast, it must be that this person is so wonderful,'” Cohen says.

58. Take a walk.

Just like a casual beach date, strut your outdoorsy self with a stroll through your favorite park in the city. “We often have deeper, more substantive conversations when we’re side-by-side rather than face-to-face,” dating expert Bela Gandhi previously told Women’s Health. Bonus: Maybe you’ll stumble upon an ice cream shop (a real love language).

59. Do improv.

Stick with me here. Sure, it sounds like a company outing gone wrong, but it can actually be a fun way to get outside your comfort zone. “You’re sharing a new experience with this person, so you’re creating a common bond and a memory for the two of you to have,” Cohen says. Now, swallow your nervousness (and pride) and add “Yes, and…” to your dating vocabulary.

60. Go to a comedy show.

Still not into the idea of embracing your inner Ali Wong? Hit up a local open mic night or comedy show. Cohen says sharing a small laugh together—even at a joke that fell completely flat—is a joint experience that communicates interest. Besides, you can figure out your date’s sense of humor and, if the vibe is right, post-show drinks keep the evening going.

61. Visit a speakeasy.

While grabbing a vodka soda at a random watering hole will take a first date straight to snooze town, walking into a speakeasy gives the evening an exclusive air. And face it: secret(ish) spots are sexy.

62. Make dinner together.

Teamwork makes the dream work. Say you and a friend decide to give your flirtation a real shot—test your compatibility over taco or pizza night. (Maybe think twice about inviting a random app date to your digs, just sayin’.) And if they can’t handle the heat? They gotta get out of the kitchen.

63. Go for brunch.

Flip the script and go for a day date, preferably where cinnamon rolls are involved. The ambiance will be more low-key, and you can chat without needing to yell about your life’s greatest passion from across the table. Then, it’s up to you if you want to extend the date into the evening or just bounce. “You don’t want to get stuck on a first date in an escape room or at a concert if you realize twenty minutes in that you aren’t interested,” Golden says.

64. Browse a record shop.

As with a bookstore date, music taste reveals a lot. And it’s an easy way to weed out those annoying music snobs (if someone knocks my Harry Styles love, I’ll ghost). Flipping through records is also a great conversation starter: you can talk about your dad’s favorite tunes, what you grew up listening to, your first concert…you get the idea.

65. Take a cooking class.

This could be the difference between locking down a gourmand or a person who’s idea of “cheffing it up” is making grilled cheese. Cohen says cooking classes can get you out of your comfort zone. Even better? No need to make dinner reservations (as long as nothing goes terribly wrong).

66. Take a virtual cooking class.

Good news, long distance daters, you can take a cooking class, too. “There are a number of virtual cooking classes that people who don’t live near one another might choose to enjoy,” says Fleming. Just be sure to PGA (post-game analyze) the cooking class with a one-on-one chat afterwards. Otherwise, it won’t feel much like a date.

67. Go mini golfing.

Working on your stroke? Get that green on the mini golf course where a little flirty competition will keep things exciting.

Just be sure to stop by the ice cream shop afterwards so you can get a sense of their tongue game. Kidding! But actually, sharing cones is a great way to ask pressing questions like, “What else are you good at besides mini golf?” and “Do you want kids?,” etc. Ya know, all the typical first date questions.

68. Go golfing golfing.

Do both of you have a set of real clubs and a swing that can air-born the ball? Fleming suggests skipping the mini golf and going straight for the big leagues.

Whether you walk or drive the course is up to you. Assuming the person in the driver seat doesn’t crash the cart, driving will give you more time to talk between swings. But walking will be more of a workout and will make you sweaty enough to find out if your pheromones are compatible. Plus, you can always hit the snack bar afterwards for a snack-and-chat.

69. Visit a museum.

So many options. Pondering hidden messages in modern art? Gallery time. Into exploring the seas? See you at the aquarium. Time traveling type? Meet up at the natural history museum. You’ll come away with an understanding of how your date sees the world and what they’re drawn to.

70. Go bowling.

Hold the blue ball jokes—and let’s hope your date does, too. Bust out your best moonwalk-in-bowling-shoes dance moves, drink some watery beer, and heckle your date. The bowling alley keeps the mood light, so you can simply enjoy the night. Have a ball, as they say.

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