John Bolton, described as a full-time “Got Milk” ad by Trevor Noah, has a new book expected to be out soon, The Room Where It Happened. No, it’s not an homage to the musical Hamilton, which has a song of roughly the same name. But the bits that have leaked from it do provide a bit of entertainment in its deliciously dishy details on Bolton’s experiences with President Donald Trump.

The book, currently delayed from its scheduled publishing while the Justice Dept. vets it for national security concerns, has already had excerpts leaked. In the excerpts, Bolton makes claims about Trump’s dealings with Turkey, China and Saudi Arabia, among other countries. None of Bolton’s tales are flattering to the President.

Noah said the incidents are not just corrupt, but really embarrassing, in that they put Trump in the role of supplicant to some pretty unsavory characters. They “make (Trump) seem like a crackhead who’s out of cash,” Noah said.

One of the book’s tales talks about how Trump didn’t know that Great Britain was a nuclear power, and claimed he asked if Finland was a part of Russia. “If he doesn’t know about white countries, what hope does Papua New Guinea have?” Noah joked.

In one particularly shocking moment, Bolton claimed Trump gave a rousing endorsement to the Saudi Government, who was in the throes of denying that they had murdered journalist Adnan Khashoggi.

Trump allegedly told Bolton that if he read the pro-Saudi statement in person, it would take attention away from a brewing scandal over whether Ivanka Trump used personal email for White House business. Noah said that was “selling out America and your ideals” to protect his daughter.

“On the other hand, I don’t remember shit about Ivanka’s email scandal,” Noah quipped.

Finally, Noah commented on Trump’s obsession about getting North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un an autographed copy of Elton John’s CD containing the song, “Rocket Man.”

Kim Jong-un was likely disappointed with the gift, and that may explain why nuclear negotiations have recently broken down with the North. “Imagine getting a signed CD, but signed by Donald Trump,” Noah said. “That’s like getting a Michael Jordan jersey signed by Donald Trump!”

Watch the video for more.

 

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