My husband’s revelation that he used to go to strip clubs has dented my confidence

DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband’s revelation that he used to go to strip clubs with workmates has dented my confidence in my looks.

I’m 52, he’s 55 and used to work in London a lot, which is where he would visit these so called gentlemen’s clubs.

I’ve also discovered he’s looked at porn for years.

We were watching TV recently and there was a strip club scene with naked girls dancing around poles.

I knew my husband was probably excited so I picked an argument, saying I bet he wished the girls were all over him.

He says he only wants me, but I feel as though I’m not good enough.

My team and I are working safely from home but we are here to help you as always.

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DEIDRE SAYS: We all have a past, but this doesn’t make your husband a bad person.

Many men and women enjoy porn without it affecting their relationship.

It is important to keep your concerns in proportion.

Talk to your partner about your feelings and listen to him. If he tells you he is happy with you, take confidence from that.

It sound like he needs to reassure you that he is still attracted to you.

My support pack Upset By Pornography? will help you both talk this through.