Ah, the wedding guestlist; a constant source of drama, whether you’re having a child-free do or need to cut down on numbers and leave someone out.
This woman has learned how controversial these things can be the hard way, with her family flying off the handle over who is (and isn’t) invited to her upcoming nuptials.
Posting on Reddit, the 32-year-old explained that she had been planning her big day since getting engaged to her fiancé, 27, around a year ago.
‘My family has been fighting me every step of the way,’ she said, revealing that they had issues with the proposed venue being ‘too far’ and her choice of food.
The bride-to-be’s relatives even tried to tell her which dress to wear, leaving her to describe the situation as ‘a nightmare’.
Things came to a head recently while the woman was having breakfast with her mum and grandmother and they were chatting about the wedding.
Her post continued: ‘My mother casually said something along the lines of a list of people she was going to invite.
‘I put my foot down and said, “No, you’re not inviting people I don’t know to my wedding.” Her response was, “Well, if I am helping pay for it then I will invite whoever I want.”‘
At this, the woman replied that she hadn’t asked for any financial assistance and she and her partner would be footing the bill themselves, meaning family weren’t able to invite extra guests – and many of those already on the list would not be getting a plus one.
‘I want a small wedding,’ she added. ’50/60 people is the absolute max and that is a lot. My guest list at the moment is right around that number and I’m not budging on it.’
This seemed to upset her grandma, who called her a ‘b*tch’ and ended the conversation.
Although the bride-to-be felt she had accommodated her mother by inviting family friends who she’d met to the celebration, she also questioned whether putting her foot down here was the right thing to do.
Yet Redditors were largely in support of her choices.
‘Some people are so entitled, it’s unreal,’ commented one user, while another said: ‘I wouldn’t even want to be around people like that.’
‘I admire that nice, shiny spine you have,’ added a third. ‘Wedding contributions almost always have strings attached. Good on you for cutting them quick!’
Keeping it simple, one more wrote: ‘Your wedding, you’re paying, your choice.’
Some even suggested uninviting the two women entirely, seating them at the back for the reception, or scrapping the whole thing and eloping.
One (slightly less extreme) piece of advice proposed: ‘Tell them if they want to throw their own little celebration/party/dinner for you and your new husband and anyone they want to invite, that they are welcome to do so and foot the bill.’
Weddings are increasingly expensive, so it’s understandable this couple are trying to avoid costs spiralling. A large gathering full of acquaintances clearly isn’t what they want either, and it’s their right to push back on the pressure and go with what suits them – especially since they’re paying.
Yet while going scorched earth on mum and grandma might cut their guest list by two, it may add even more drama to an already-fraught situation, as well as alienating those who they actually want to spend the day with.
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