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A bride-to-be was gobsmacked when she unloaded her food shopping recently to discover what looked like a penis.
Kathleen Stevens was rather shocked when she pulled a potato out of her shopping bag – and came face-to-face with what appeared to be a giant manhood.
Even her fiancé, Jack Davis, was left stunned as Kathleen, 27, burst out laughing and told him her spud from a local market would give him a run for his money.
She had spent £1.75 on potatoes at the Windsor Farmers Xmas Market in the royal town and was planning to make her partner Jack his favourite dinner of bangers and mash.
She recalled: "When I got this in my hand Jack nearly spat his tea out and told me that there was no way he was eating that for his supper and to go out and get some other ones.
"I saw the farmer giving me a big smile and a wink when he put the potatoes in the bag and I wonder now if he knew what I would be grabbing hold of a little bit later!
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"Jack normally likes his meat and two veg but he made it clear that this cheeky fella was not on the menu but I think he was just a little worried about a bit of competition."
Kathleen, who works for SEND which is a specials need group, said: "I told Jack if he didn’t want it mashed up then he could have it roasted but his eyes just began to water!"
Jack, who lives with Kathleen in Maidenhead, Berks, added: "It’s a whopper alright! It doesn’t quite put me to shame but it is not far off that’s for sure but I could not bear the thought of it being mashed up or chopped up as it made me cross my legs.
"We have kept the spud in the vegetable basket and don’t know what to do with it!Who knows? Ann Summers may want to buy it to use it as a mould for a sex toy!" he joked.
After a week as the potato began to lose its shine, Kathleen added: "While Jack was at work I turned it into cock-a-leekie soup – he has no idea he has eaten it yet!"
- Food
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