Traditionally, weddings mark the coming together of two families. But one couple’s big day ended up being a one-sided affair, after the bride asked the groom’s entire family to leave.

The bride shared her story on Reddit’s AITA (Am I The Arsehole) channel, explaining how her husband’s family have some unconventional traditions, such as all wearing white to weddings.

Their family also tends to have all children in attendance involved in the wedding ceremony, by asking them to take turns walking down the aisle scattering flowers, instead of having just one flower girl.

But for their nuptials, the couple in question decided to do things their way. They told all guests the dress code (normal wedding attire, no white) and asked the parents to book childcare, because they’d agreed on an adults-only day.

Well, you might be able to guess what happened next.

‘The day of the wedding came, and my side of the family was dressed appropriately, no children were present, everything was going great,’ the bride said.

‘Then, Ben’s family came. There were lots of children and babies and everyone was wearing all white. Apparently their traditions were more important than what I had to say. Only three people actually respected the rules set in place – the spouses of Ben’s siblings. Ben and I were mortified. We immediately kicked them out and allowed the three people who followed the rules to stay, but they left with their partners (which we didn’t mind).

‘The wedding went on as normal, but it felt ruined. We ended up cancelling the post-wedding celebration after some of his family members snuck inside.’

After the couple came back from honeymoon, they were ‘berated’ by the groom’s side of the family and have been ‘basically shunned’ since.  

‘I feel guilty for not allowing them to practice their traditions. AITA?’ the bride asked.

In the comments, the vast majority of people agreed to bride was not in the wrong, and instead blamed the groom’s family for their disrespectful behavior.

‘That’s not a family – that’s a cult,’ one person said. ‘Make sure your husband has been thoroughly deprogrammed.’

Another added: ‘You set up rules for your wedding. They did not comply with those rules. It’s that simple.’

Getting the etiquette right

In all honesty, it’s common sense. Abide by the dress code, do not bring a plus one (or children) if they haven’t been invited, and do not start moving your place in the seating plan (you’ll cause an absolute headache for the catering staff).

If in doubt about what to do or wear, ask the couple in advance, says celebrity wedding planner Liz Taylor. Your role as a guest is to eat, drink, be merry – and let the bride have her moment.

‘Guests should never try to upstage the bride,’ she previously told Metro. ‘If you are privileged enough to be invited to attend a wedding day, it’s your responsibility to dress in an appropriate style and colour.

‘Guests trying to upstage the bride is rare, but it does happen. I once had a mother of the bride that wanted to wear white to the day, and indeed did, which had the bride in tears. She was devastated.’

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