Anton. How we love thee. You were an underappreciated smooth-bummed ball of energy and now, finally, in Episode 17, we’re becoming aware of your many wonders.

He’s the eternal optimist, “buzzing” every time anything happens, so it’s unsurprising that he seemed under the impression that the newest goddess to the Villa, Arabella, was leaning towards him. Early on in Friday’s show, he said: “I do feel like she’s edging a bit more towards me”. Um, no, because there’s zero challenge but – again – you’ve gotta love that that optimism. Oh, and according to Arabella, he’s a ‘s***’ kisser.

Anton may be routinely rejected in the Villa, but he’s becoming something of a demigod among viewers. From murmuring “I’m not sure that was who you thought it was” to Curtis after he went jelly-legged during tonight’s kissing challenge, and providing a running commentary to Danny regarding the supermodel and the scientist fighting over him – Anton is the Villa’s embodiment of Ian Sterling.

CURTIS CRUISING FOR A BRUISING
There he was. Grinning and brimming with joy, saying “Good connection, it’s a 10” after his germ swap with Arabella. Amy nearly squinted herself into oblivion… which is to be expected considering she’d already kissed ‘Half-Boyfriend’ Curtis and he only gave her a Len Goodman. SEVEN!

Understandable strop impending, Curtis was keen to squash the issue immediately but Amy was irked he didn’t read the signs. She said “I scratched your neck like I always do, so you knew it was me. And then you gave me a seven and rated everyone else really high.” Curtis, seemingly unaware he could make things worse, repeatedly said: “I didn’t know that it was you.”

Sensing he was in the doghouse, producers sent Danny Zucko and Sandy on a date, demanding #turnthatsevenintoaten. Perched at the trestle table with their garage chocolates, Amy elaborated on her appreciation of Curtis by talking about, well, herself mostly…

“You make me feel like a princess. I’m not an affectionate person but in the short time we’ve known each other I’ve become more like that. Nobody else is half boyfriend and girlfriend. That is unique to us.” Indeed it is, Amy, indeed it is.

Curtis responded in kind and saying: “I am happy. We’re going in the correct direction. I can’t wait to see what the future holds.” And other such mechanical platitudes.

FLIRTING 101 WITH YEWANDE
Ideally, affection should not be forced. Yewande did not get this memo. Ergo, she announced “I’m gonna go down there and be affectionate”, before marching up to Danny and Arabella, unceremoniously plonking herself down on top of his leg/hand, saying “I gonna just sit on you because I want to”… Smooth

KISSING CONTEST RESULTS
It was nice for us Irish to get a shout out from Ian Sterling – especially considering we can’t vote for ANYTHING, despite two Irish girls being in there. What did Ian Sterling say? He referred to the closer of the germ fest as “What our Irish viewers would call “THE END OF THE SHIFT”.

Read more: Tanya Sweeney on Love Island: ‘There’s an unseemly subtext to this dynamic: that women don’t enjoy sex quite the same as men’

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