I want to leave my sensible twins girls, 15, home alone while I work nights – I trust them, but people are warning I could be reported to social services

• A mother took to Mumsnet to seek advice on leaving her daughters home alone
• READ MORE: I told my daughter to lie to her school teacher about being sick

A mother has sought advice on whether she should leave her 15-year-old teenage daughters home alone while she works a ‘couple of night shifts’.

The woman took to UK parenting forum Mumsnet to explain she wanted to work night shifts which meant she would be away from 5pm on a Saturday night to 11am on a Sunday.

She described her girls as ‘quite independent’ and ‘very sensible’.   

And she quizzed the forum on whether it was okay to do this – adding that her daughters had ‘no special needs or risk taking behaviour’. 

But her post divided opinion, with one woman revealing she would ‘absolutely invite a boy over’ if she was in their shoes.

A woman took to UK parenting website Mumsnet for advice on whether it’s safe to leave her ‘sensible’ teenage daughters home alone while she works a ‘couple of night shifts’ (Stock image)

In her original post, the mother explained: ‘I have 15-year-old twins who are very sensible and quite independent. 

‘They travel to school on their own (separately) in different boroughs, one comes home herself about 7pm after her after-school activities. The other stays home alone until I get home from work, sometimes late. 

‘They have been very comfortable being home by themselves for years during the day and at nights when I get home about 11pm. I was a key worker during lock down and they were home alone all day in 2020 (age 13)’.

When she asked her children if they minded that she work nights, the twins assured her it was ‘okay’ – given that she would only be an hour away. 

She added that the girls were accustomed to being home alone as when she worked weekend mornings, she left the house at 6am ‘before they wake’.

She asked the forum: ‘At what age would you think it will be okay to leave children alone overnight assuming there are no special needs and no risk taking behaviour? 

‘I remember babysitting other people’s kids overnight when I was 15.

‘I know there have been posts about what age to leave children home alone. I am asking now about how you feel now in 2023 and what you think is okay.

‘Am I being unreasonable to leave 15-year-olds at home from 5pm Saturday night to 11am Sunday morning?’

The unknown woman explained it was the first time she was leaving her twin daughters, both 15, home alone – and it would only be from ‘5pm Saturday night to 11am Sunday morning’

Her post divided opinion, with some warning her against it. 

One parent wrote: ‘Personally I wouldn’t. It would be seen as a safeguarding concern if the school found out’. 

A second said she would invite a boy over if she was in their shoes: ‘I was a very well behaved teen who did not take risks. If I then acquired a boyfriend I would absolutely have invited that boy over. Your lovely twins are safe partly because you are there.’

There was also feedback from a school expert, who wrote: ‘I work in a school. I would report it to the safeguarding lead. They would undoubtedly call the parents to discuss this. If the poster thinks she can justify this then fine.’

She went on to write: ‘Let’s imagine her girls invite someone round. They get some alcohol. They get sick and need help. 

‘Most kids eventually do things their parents do not expect or approve of. I certainly did and I am sure my parents would have said the same about me. I worked hard and was seemingly a very good daughter. 

‘It is naive to think that your kids might not experiment. Being around to ensure they are home safe and in bed is the basic minimum.’

Her post divided opinion, with one woman revealing she would ‘absolutely invite a boy over’ if she was in their shoes – while others said it was a ‘safeguarding’ concern

Echoing this sentiment, a fourth said: ‘Let’s look at it this way. The school leaves your 15-year-old unsupervised on a trip overnight. Would that be a safeguarding risk? Yes of course it would. Why is it different? No your kids are not going to be taken into care but questions will be asked. If you are okay with that then go for it’. 

But several others disagreed, saying 15 was a perfectly reasonable age to leave twins to sleep by themselves. 

One wrote: ‘I wouldn’t judge at all, they sound sensible. You know them best. We have video chats these days which offer good peace of mind too.’

Another added: ‘I have an incredibly sensible 15 (almost 16) year-old and I would as long as they were also comfortable with it. I think it’s down to personal judgement but you know your children.’

Another pointed out that it was technically illegal. 

She wrote: ‘I would leave them overnight at 15 but the law says they have to be 16.’

While another said they felt it depended on the circumstances. 

They wrote: ‘It depends on the maturity of your child, and your neighbourhood. 

‘I would imagine a 15 year old is well-equipped to fend for themselves.’

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