DEAR DEIDRE: I’M a gay man and madly in love with my new partner but I’m terrified he’s going to cheat.

I’ve had a catalogue of terrible relationships previously. I’m 31 now.


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First, I was with somebody who was physically abusive, then somebody who cheated and then somebody who dumped me on Christmas Day.

It turned out he had met somebody else and I was heartbroken for a year.

I met my new partner on a training course from work.

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He’s 36 and we’ve fallen in love so fast, but I can’t bear it if I don’t know where he is or who he’s with.

If his phone pings, I want to know who it is. I know it’s pushing him away but I can’t help myself.

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DEIDRE SAYS: It’s understandable you’re anxious given your relationship history but being too clingy can ruin something good.

Explain to your partner why you get anxious – that you have been let down several times before and I’m sure he’ll reassure you.

Jealousy is normally rooted in insecurity and low self-esteem so try to focus on the positives in your relationship and less on any potential negatives.

And start to socialise with your own friends as well. It’s healthy for you both to have your own social life as well as spending time together.

My Dealing With Jealousy support pack will help too.

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