‘I wanted to take my life!’ Stephen Fry reveals he was a suicidal teen who felt ‘lost and adrift’ during his ‘disastrous childhood’ which led to a prison spell

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Stephen Fry has revealed that he was a suicidal teen, admitting that he wanted to take his own life.

In a new interview, the successful writer, actor, director and comedian, now 65, confessed that he felt ‘lost and adrift’ during his ‘disastrous childhood’ which led to a prison spell. 

After being expelled from multiple schools, at the age of 17, Stephen was convicted of credit card fraud and was sent to Pucklechurch Prison on remand for three months. 

Candid childhood chat: Stephen Fry, 65, has revealed that he was a suicidal teen, admitting that he wanted to take his own life

Stephen, who has a history of manic depression and suffers from bipolar disorder, told the Diary of A CEO podcast: ‘I was a disruptive, deeply difficult, screwed up child.’

He recalled: ‘Socially, I never fitted in, and felt fitted in, because I was bad at all the things that were valued as a child.’

Stephen explained that he couldn’t catch a ball, he couldn’t paint and wasn’t musical, saying all he had was his ‘passion for language’.

‘It was at boarding school. I was sent away at the age of seven. My parents were on the east coast in Norfolk and I was sent to Gloucestershire on the west coast.

Throwback: In a new interview, the star, now 65, confessed that he felt ‘lost and adrift’ during his ‘disastrous childhood’ which led to a prison spell (Pictured aged 14)

Real talk: Stephen, who has a history of manic depression and suffers from bipolar disorder, told the Diary of A CEO podcast : ‘I was a disruptive, deeply difficult, screwed up child’

‘To some people sounds a bit cruel to send a child 200 miles away. But that was what happened, as far as I was concerned. My brother had gone, and everyone at that school was in the same situation.’

‘Aged seven to 13, I was very disruptive,’ admitted the star before recalling how aged 13, after falling in love with a boy he began doing ‘weird things.’

He said ‘Things begin to bubble inside you. Things begin to happen in your mind and soul. I was not prepared for the glorious catastrophe of love. 

‘I started doing weird things like climbing all the roofs. That was the first school I was expelled from. Then I left home and went to London.’

Honest: ‘Aged seven to 13, I was very disruptive,’ admitted the star before recalling how aged 13, after falling in love with a boy he began doing ‘weird things’

Later in the chat, Stephen revealed: ‘My parents took me to a psychiatrist when I was 14. A very grand Harley Street office.

‘Apparently the things I did and the way I behaved were typical of people from unsettled families. He prescribed me something.’

He added: ‘They recognised that there was a mental kink in me,’ but sadly Stephen wasn’t diagnosed with bipolar until the age of 37. 

Elsewhere in the podcast chat, Stephen admitted that he attempted suicide aged 17, confessing: ‘Really what I first wanted to do was to take my life.’ 

Family: ‘My parents took me to a psychiatrist when I was 14… He prescribed me something… ‘They recognised that there was a mental kink in me’ (Pictured in 2003 with his parents)

Stephen also recalled how, after moving to London aged 17, he then stole a coat from a pub and later realised it had a wallet with two credit cards in it, which were ‘very easy to use fraudulently.’ 

Ultimately, after using them to live lavishly across the country, he was arrested and sent to prison on remand for three months, and was later given two years probation.

What is bipolar disorder and how is it managed?

Bipolar disorder, formerly known as manic depression, can cause people to have extreme mood swings.

It gives them episodes of depression – feeling very low and lethargic – and mania, feeling very high and overactive.

Each extreme episode of the condition can last for several weeks, and some sufferers may not often experience a ‘normal’ mood.

Treatment options for managing bipolar disorder include mood stabilisers or psychological treatment, such as talking therapy.

Doing regular exercise and planning activities that give a sense of achievement are also recommended by the NHS.

Bipolar disorder is believed to be caused by extreme stress, overwhelming problems and life-changing events – as well as genetic and chemical factors.

He said: ‘So, the best I could do after a disastrous childhood, I decided, was now concentrate on getting into Cambridge.

‘That changed everything…I want to please people. And if I don’t please them, I get upset. I’ve done it wrong.’

Stephen has previously raised awareness for mental health after publicly addressing his own struggle with manic depression.

In 2013 the star admitted he tried to commit suicide the year prior by overdosing on a cocktail of vodka and pills, and was only saved by a producer who discovered him.

Speaking in 2021, Fry said he had noticed a ‘general rise in unhappiness amongst the young’ – regardless of their social standing – and warned his visits to schools as part of mental health charity Mind showed him a ‘prevalence of self-harm’.

He told the Blank podcast: ‘There is the general rise in unhappiness amongst the young which is manifested if no other way by the appalling epidemic of self-harm, which I don’t remember as a child.

‘It may just be we were protected from the notion or it may be that it didn’t exist in quite the way that it now does.

‘But I don’t remember the phrase ‘self-harm’, I don’t remember ever hearing about a child – that I was at school with or at any school I attended – cutting themselves with knives.’

He added: ‘I’ve been to schools you might describe as sink schools. It’s a horrible phrase but schools whose at pupils are drawn from very deprived and underprivileged areas and I’ve been to literally to Eton or other expensive private schools to talk.

‘What’s interesting is there doesn’t seem to be a difference in the prevalence of self-harm.’

Awful: Elsewhere in the podcast chat, Stephen admitted that he attempted suicide aged 17, confessing: ‘Really what I first wanted to do was to take my life’

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